Sunday, November 19, 2006

The Vietnam Show.

I have to say that we are absolutely appalled by the behavior of the Vietnamese. I, of course, am not speaking of all Vietnamese, just some of them. This particular rant is going to fly a little south of politically correct, so I warn you now.
It now seems to us, that we are in the middle of a large, seemingly endless nature programme, where we are the explorers observing the native Vietnamese in their natural habitat. We are in awe of their unique and wondrous behavior. We have had the glorious opportunity to see grown men urinating in to the street, facing traffic, with absolutely no shame in their actions. We have stood by, observing as both men and woman go, knuckle deep, in to a nostril and root to satisfaction with a complete lack of embarrassment.
We have spent enough time around these wondrous folk that they have grown comfortable in our presence. On many occasion I will have a Vietnamese adult male walk up to me on the street, and without so much as a word start to rub my belly or squeeze my arms and shoulders. I take this to be an acceptance of some kind, and although it is unwanted and quite off-putting I have grown to tolerate it.
The truly exciting find is the "lifters". I believe them to be a discovery otherwise unknown to the western world, and we are racking our brains to come up with a more suitable name for these interesting little variety of Vietnamese males. I have experienced the actions of a "lifter" on four separate occasions. In every example it was a full grown male, Whom I had no previous interaction with. In each case this male would walk around me, scrutinizing me to their fullest extent. Once satisfied with his observations he leaps behind me and attempts to lift me off the ground. In every experience the lifter has failed miserable, yet there is little to no impact on the "Lifters" mood, as they seem relatively happy with the simple act of trying, and success seems unimportant.
Another puzzling aspect of their nature, both male and female, is the constant need for attention. They obtain that attention by being the loudest, most obnoxious voice in any given place. You have to imagine that a restaurant full of people like this can make quite a racket. This behaviour also takes itself to the streets where Vietnamese people try to outdo each other in both volume and duration of horn blasting. We have yet to figure out if this action is based on aggression or if it is possibly some kind of mating performance. We have not been in country long enough to make determinations like that.
Well, this is it for this installment of The Nature of Things in Vietnam, We will keep you posted on further finding of these curious creatures.
Until next time,

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